Archive for July, 2009
Bring Back the Almonds
Wednesday, July 29th, 2009 | Life | 7 Comments
Last night, I was watching some entertainment show and they mentioned a video on You Tube that was a big sensation. So I went to the site.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0
I saw it and I thought that this was a one of a kind video; boy was I wrong. It seems that weddings have changed.
I guess that wedding ceremonies have always evolved. At one time, I assume, that people would give chickens as wedding presents and very few of them would fight over the flowers in the center of the table.
For a long time, however, one thing had remained the same:the favors. Treditionally, every guest used to get a small amount of Jordan almonds. From wikipedia I found out that “Traditionally, five Jordan almonds are presented in a confection box or wrapped in elegant fabric to represent fertility, longevity, wealth, health and happiness. The bitterness of the almond and the sweetness of the coated candy exemplify the bitter sweetness of a marriage.”http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wedding_favors
Sometime in the sixties I notice a change and it started with the Jordan almonds. When I would go to weddings, couples would give favors like wine, engraved glasses and anything as long as it wasn’t almonds. It soon spread to the whole wedding where the whole wedding became a game of can you top this.
Now, don’t get me wrong, the video alluded to above represnts a lot of work and dedication, not only to the couple but to the show. I discovered this after I saw the first video and went on to subsequent videos. I’m afraid that is the problem.
The subsequent videos ran the gamut from good to embarassing. Some of them made me feel like I was at a long kindergarten show where I didn’t have a child performing. So if you are going to do a show then at least do enough preparation to do it well.
Hopefully, with the economic problems our country is facing maybe we will start to tone it down. I’m afraid that it mght not be so. I have a twelve year old boy and I live in fear that his wedding day might turn out like this:
“What’s the matter Matt?”
“The guy hasn’t arrived with the circus calliope yet.”
“Do you need it?”
“The Elephants won’t move without them”
“Do you really need them?”
“Weren’t you paying attention when me and Beautiful Girl Who Was Named After Her Beautiful Mother Who Wanted To Give Her Girl A Unique Name That No One Would Think Of told you the plan.”
“I tried, but I was trying to remember her name”
” Just call her “B” everyone else does. Now here is the plan. The calliope plays, everyone whose name ends in e throws peanut shells in the aisle,the elephants crush the shells, the flower girls throw down hot coals on the shells, the first groomsman and bridesmaid walk across dropping planks so the next couple singing an aria from “Carmen”can ride their camels across dropping water so the planks don’t catch on fire and dragging in the portable ice rink so the best man and maid of honor can re create Disney on Ice.”B” and I will then swing in from the balcony dressed as Tarzan and Jane in formal dress while Phil Collins sings You’ll be in my Heart” Got it?
“Yes, did you do what I wanted?”
“B” got them. But what the hell are Jordan Almonds?
Maybe We Should Try Democracy?
Tuesday, July 21st, 2009 | Economics, Politics | No Comments
Most people think that what we were told in school is true. We are told that we live in a democracy but in truth we live in a representative democracy. How does this change things? Well, in a democracy the majority rules, everyone is pushing for the law to benefit themselves, and the amount of cash they have has no influence on the vote.
In a representative democracy the representatives rule, normally with the rich minority in mind. The representatives have only their job on their mind not the law or your benefit. The only reason that they pay any attention to the rich minority is because they need to get reelected and that costs money.
When the founding fathers came up with the idea of a representative democracy it was a good idea. The majority of our populace was not well educated and so it made sense that the rich, who were, should make decisions for the majority Our country has progessed since then to the point that the majority is well educated enough to make decisions about their welfare.
What I am suggesting is that we change from the representative democracy to a pure democracy. You could set it up sort of like the voting on American Idol, after all, more people vote for American Idol then for our President. Wouldn’t that mean that we would be subject to voter fraud? Well we could always get someone like Richard Daley or even our Supreme Court to oversee the election. We know that fraud could never happen on their watch.
I know that you are probably thinking that this would lead to chaos and perhaps it would. We would no longer send jobs overseas because we would realize that the extra money in wages we would be getting from the closing of the rich’s tax loopholes would make us realize that buying even America’s worst products is still keeping money in America. It would make it almost impossible for lobbyist to do their job which could lead to universal healthcare, gun control, or even not jumping into senseless wars. Total chaos!
Warren
P.S. There are now Congressmen who want to pass a bill to make it mandatory for the President to prove that he meets the qualifications to be President. Ordinarily I would think that they had gone too far but in this case I don’t think they have gone far enough. We should make it mandatory for all public officials. Does that mean that many hours would be wasted by the Congress in following the law? Not as many as they are wasting now.
Feeling a Little Wishsy Washy
Wednesday, July 15th, 2009 | General | 1 Comment
I grew up during the 60’s and I always believed that I was a confirmed Liberal but lately I’m feeling a little wishy washy. I still believe in equal rights for everyone, health care for all and all the other things that most people would label me, Liberal for but I’m starting to believe that there are things that we should be Conservative on.
I was watching channel 11 this morning and they had Karrine Steffans on hawking her new book, The Vixen Manual. This book purports to tell you how to find, seduce and keep the man you want. Great! just what we need relationship advice from an unmarried mother who was at various times a hooker. stripper, and a celebrity toy. She also is a New York Times best selling author which means that sleaze still sells. Why would anyone take her advice on how to keep a man when she obviously can’t–not even the father of her child. Do we really need to shell out twenty to thirty dollars to find out that if a man and a woman walk into a bar and both say that they will sleep with any one there, that the man may not get more takers then the woman?
Maybe I’m just getting a little tired of the experts, who don’t seem to be. I have never liked Dr. Phil and recently I have heard that he isn’t even a psychologist. So I looked it up on the internet on Wikapedia and it turns out that he was a psychologist but he lost his license in Texas. He recieved a reprimand and was told to take an ethics class which according to the Internet might be the reason he doesn’t have his license. Go to:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phil_McGraw or http://dir.salon.com/story/ent/feature/2003/11/24/phil/index.html to read my research.
Another person I wouldn’t take advice from is Patti Stanger from the Millionaire Matchmaker (all right, I guess she is not worried about losing my business). She is not married and she still hasn’t bagged a millionaire for herself. Why not? She obviously doesn’t mind taking a millionaire’s money.
Maybe I’m being too conservative, but I think people should be able to walk the walk then maybe I’ll be able to believe their talk.
Political Potpourri II
Tuesday, July 7th, 2009 | Politics | 2 Comments
Once again the political equivalent of Paris Hilton has grabbed the spotlight. Sarah Palin has resigned from being the Governor of Alaska. My feeling is that she is going to go back to television as a talk show host. If Mike Huckabee can do it why can’t she?
This way she can pontificate without facing ethics questions which seems like a win for her. Alaska gets a new Governor, Wasilla can act questionably without national media attention and we may get the chance to cancel her show (talk about win-win).
The Republicans should change their name to The Do As I Say, Not As I Do Party.Governor Mark Sanford has refused to step down, despite the fact that he wanted Clinton to, for his transgressions. When Eliot Spitzer stepped down he didn’t exactly jump to defend him, yet both of them committed adultery. Both New York and South Carolina make adultery a crime.
Then, of course, we have Senator John Ensign who not only committed adultery but was nice enough to hire not only his mistress but her husband and their son as well. Talk about abuse of power. The only reason that he admitted it was that he was being blackmailed by the husband and Ensign was too honorable to be blackmailed.
The thing that worries me most is that if the Republicans keep losing their front runners they may draft me.